Round 3 - University give Saints the blues - Mt Roskill Saints Auckland AFL FC

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Thursday, 24 September, 2009

The sun was out, the birds were chirping and Dave Kuss had his lucky pair of lace panties on, the scene was set for a Saint’s upset. The first quater started out well with the mighty saints dominating possession and territory for the first 10 minutes but were unable to turn it into points, and after a turnover at halfway uni sent the first goal through the posts. The saints and blues traded 6 pointers through Lewis "blonde assassin" Hurst and Brendan "total package" Clark but the Sainters went into the first break trailing by a handful of goals.

In the break coach Kemp let his frustration vent, allegedly pulling hulking back BJ "lock up your daughters" Jansen to one side and threatening his place in the side if he didn’t start "manhandling " his opposite. The sound of the second quater siren sounded and the men in white, red and black were ready to roll. Making a cameo appearance a rather rotund "LEX" led the way with some perfectly timed kicks and delicate handballs which helped his team into the forward-line, where another long lost saint Dion "yellow card" Nash found himself bagging a couple of (approx) 50+ metre monsters. Stunning defence from the backline helped stem the flow of uni goals and by halftime the mongrels from Mount Roskill were only trailing by one goal, however it came at a cost when new import known only as "tom" got a bit over eager with his defence and bumped his head, splitting it like a over cooked sausage on a bbq.

The University team were feeling a little upset so went to the shed for a cuddle and to rub Vicks Vapour rub on each others chest while the saints crew got a visit and inspirational speech from Saints stalwart Peter "panther" Boyce, he pushed home the fact that they were still in it and that if they ended up with more points that uni that the saints would probably come away with the win. With tears running down there face from the panthers moving words the Roskill boys moved into position, hungrier than ever, and uni-blues were on the menu. Following the lead of Tabe "sumo" Voigt and the coach himself Matthew "clipboard" Kemp, the Sainters started to claw back the points. Only 2 points behind, pre-teen heart-throb Liam "puppy" Acland had the chance to take the lead, but in a cruel twist of fate he saw a tidy looking 14yr old female walking by, slicing the kick out of bounds leaving the saints behind but well within reach with 20 minutes to go.

Starting well in the fourth quarter it was looking like the tri-colours might break a long standing drought, when out of nowhere captain Dave "short fuse" Kay thought he would test his loyal men by taking a 10 minute break on the sideline, leaving them a man down and without a leader. This proved to much for the Saints men who ran around aimlessly like a lamb who had lost its mother, letting uni extend there lead and snatch victory. With their first loss of the season the crew from Roskill will be out to lay a whole lotta hurt on Takapuna next week in the battle of the bridge.

Seniors
Waitakere 18. 13. 121 v Manurewa 5. 9. 39
North Shore 11. 15. 81 v Takapuna 5. 7. 37
University 15. 2. 92 v Mt Roskill 10. 6. 66

Reserve Grade
Waitakere 16. 3. 99 v Manurewa 4. 8. 32
North Shore 6. 8. 44 v Takapuna 3. 6. 24
Mt Roskill 13. 13. 91 v University 13. 1. 79